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 October 11, 2001

 |  |  |  |  |  |  |  | Dear Dr. Needlman, What do I say to friends who call my 13-month-old son a spoiled brat? My son has always been a high-needs child, and since the recent terrorist attacks, he has been more intense and moody. His daddy went away in the wake of all the recent events, which has been a very emotional time for his intensely emotional mommy (my husband is a Marine and we had friends and family in the Pentagon and the World Trade Center).
I want to be reassuring, but my friends tell me I am spoiling him...  Dear Mommabear, It probably isn't ever helpful to think of a 13-month-old as a 'spoiled brat.' Those words imply that the there is something wrong with the child himself, rather than there being a problem with the child's behavior. A young child... 
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| FEATURED TOPICS |  |  |  |  |  |  |  |  Can You Spoil an Infant? Contrary to what some people think, attending to an infant every time she cries does not teach her to act spoiled. Rather, it helps to instill in her a sense of trust. Find out more here...
 |  |  |  |  |  |  Spoiling: Why We Do It For some parents, having a baby is an answer to their prayers. They may have wanted a baby for so long that they get caught up in showering the child with excessive amounts of gifts and attention. For others, spoiling results from the parents' own insecurities. Learn more here...
 |  |  |  |  |  |  Separation Anxiety It's a good idea to avoid leaving your infant for more than 8 to 12 hours at a time. If you're going to be gone longer than that, here are ways to help prepare him for your absence.
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 |  | Spoiling is perhaps one of the most fundamental concerns that parents have when it comes to raising children, and the subject of whether an infant can, in fact, be spoiled is hotly debated among parents and pediatricians alike. As a result, you may find yourself worrying about responding too quickly to your baby's cries or holding her too much. Or you may not want to leave her in someone else's care because you'll feel guilty about not devoting all your time to her. Certainly, how you react now teaches your child a lot about what to expect from you in the future. But the fact is that babies need love, attention, and security--and providing your child with these basics doesn't have to mean that you'll be a slave to her every whim. Check out our articles on spoiling to find out more. 
| PARENTS ARE TALKING |  | | AUTHOR: danzam SUBJECT: solid foods DATE: October 05, 2001 |  I am having a really hard time getting my six-month-old to eat any fruits or veggies. All she does is turn her head and clamp down on the spoon when I try to feed her. Please help! |  | | THIS WEEK'S TIP |  |  When your infant experiences a minor tumble, or is at the doctor's to get his immunizations, be careful how you react to his fears or tears. If you put on a calm face (even if you feel upset inside), he's likely to deal with the situation much more calmly. However, if your infant sees that you look worried or alarmed, he may only feel more frightened or upset. |
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