Dr. Robert Needlman
Specialist in pediatric behavior and development.
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 Ask Dr. Needlman
Homesick 10-Year-Old | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Needlman,
Hi. My 10-year-old son has had a problem with homesickness lately and had to come home during the night from sleepovers or birthday parties. He has actually gotten physically sick from nervousness. He had to come home from a Halloween party because he got "that feeling" when everyone was getting ready to go out into the dark and trick or treat. How can I help him? Is this common for this age group? He's a very sports-oriented boy, but also very sensitive. His older brother never had a problem with this and I want to help! Thx so much.
— Mary in NJ | | | ANSWER |
October 31, 2000 | | | Dear Mary,
Your question is one that many, many parents share. While some 10-year-old boys happily go off to overnight camp for a month and think nothing of sleepovers, many are simply not ready for these separations until they are 11 or 12 or older. Given time and acceptance, most will become more and more comfortable, and be able to handle all of the expected separations in their own time.
If the separation problems are part of a larger picture of difficulty (not just missing sleepovers, but missing school and various social events, or frequently getting ill with worry) then it makes sense to get help with the problem. For more on anxiousness and problems separating, see Difficulty Being Away from Parents.
— by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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