Dr. Robert Needlman
Specialist in pediatric behavior and development.
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 Ask Dr. Needlman
A Child Who Says All of Her Clothes Bother Her | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Needlman,
My five-year-old says that all her clothes bother her. Ex: elastic around waist, writing on shirts, bows - most everything. This leads to major fights every morning trying to get dressed. Will only wear slip on sandals - no tennis shoes, socks, etc. Won't even put her hair up in ponytail holders now because she says it bothers her.— Jamie in KATY, TX | | | ANSWER |
April 6, 2001 | | | Dear Jaime,
I'm glad you asked this question because a great many parents share your problem. I remember similar hassles in my own home when my daughter was the same age.
Exaggerated sensitivity to textures and touch sensations in general is very common among preschool-age children. Over sensitivity to sounds, smells, and movements (with very easy car sickness, for example) also are common. Children tend to grow out of it by the time they are in second or third grade (although some take longer).
There is a theory called "Sensory Integration" that talks about how the brain takes in sensory information and processes it. That processing includes ignoring sensations that are meaningless, such as the feel of a shirt label at the back of your neck, or the rub of your pants against the back of your knees. Probably because of incomplete brain maturation, many young children have a hard time with these sensory integration tasks. As a result, getting dressed in the morning can be a real trial for everyone.
I don't know how to fix this problem, but I think it helps to realize that your child is not making these sensations up; she is not being balky in order to irritate you; she is not being "bad." She is merely being young. (Of course, children sometimes do use resistance to getting dressed as a way to avoid having to do something they don't want to do, or just because they are dawdling, but the complaint that "everything bothers me" stongly suggests physical oversensitivity.)
Patience and sympathy may help: "I know you hate how this feels, but you just have to put it on... yes, you do ... even though you hate it... etc. etc." While you are being sympathetic, you also are helping your child get into her clothes. Compromise is helpful: if you can figure out clothes that are less bothersome, by all means go with them when you can.— by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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