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 Ask Dr. Jana
Six-Week-Old Who Only Sleeps When Held | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Jana,
I recently gave birth to a 9 lb. 8 oz. baby girl. She is now six weeks old. The problem I am having is that she only wants to be held. When she falls asleep in our arms she will instantly awaken when placed in her crib, on a bed, etc. I end up holding her all night so the other members of the household can sleep. A lot of people suggest I just let her cry herself to sleep in her crib. This seems incredibly harsh for a six-week-old. Do you have any suggestions or do you feel she will grow out of this as she gets older? Please help. Thank you for your consideration.— Ann in Oceanside, California | | | ANSWER |
May 23, 2001 | | | Dear Ann,
I can definitely relate to your situation as well as your need to get some rest. Most new parents are faced with some issue pertaining to their newborn's sleep habits. I have found that when young babies cry unless they are being held during sleep, they often times are responding to the feeling of being cozy and bundled up. After having grown accustomed to being in the uterus for nine months, some babies just don't seem to like to be put down in a big open crib and left to flail around. You might want to try swaddling your daughter in a baby blanket (although you should make sure she will not be too warmly dressed) and tuck her closer to one of the sides of the crib. Some parents might worry that this type of bundling may cause SIDS, but in fact it doesn't. Just be sure that once she is swaddled, you put your baby down to sleep on her back, and make sure her face is not at risk of being covered. You may also be interested in looking at our upcoming article on crib safety as well.
With regard to your daughter's young age and it seeming "incredibly harsh" to let her cry it out, I would tend to agree if your friends are simply suggesting you plop her in her crib and leave. Some babies are not truly ready to simply be put down and left to fall asleep on their own until closer to four months of age. That said, it is not too early to try and lay some groundwork for future good sleep habits. For now, I would suggest you make a clear distinction between night and day by making your daughter's room quiet and dark. I would also suggest that you try to adjust her schedule so that whenever possible, she does not use feeding (whether it be bottle or breast) as a way to fall asleep. And work towards having your daughter spend time awake where she's not being held--especially if it's when she is tired and can learn to drift off to sleep independently. You may be pleasantly surprised how quickly she learns!
What you should not worry about is that your daughter is spoiled (see our section on spoiling), that some amount of crying will harm her, or that she will always have problems sleeping.
The other thing I will say is that you must be exhausted, and part of being able to take care of your daughter is taking care of yourself. I hope that you can find someone who can give you a break along the way.— by Laura Jana, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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