Dr. Robert Needlman
Specialist in pediatric behavior and development.
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 Ask Dr. Needlman
Potty-Trained Preschooler Having Daytime Accidents | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Needlman,
My daughter is four. She understands using the potty and has no problem on that end. However, she has days where she pees her pants "just because she didn't feel like going on the potty." I am at my wits end and out of ideas. Help!— Very Frustrated Mom in Indiana, PA | | | ANSWER |
March 15, 2001 | | | Dear Very Frustrated Mom,
Many parents share your frustration. Young children get very involved in what they are doing, and they just don't want to stop. By the time the sensation of having to go is strong enough to interrupt their play, they can't hold it.
It's reasonable with daytime wetting to make sure there isn't a medical or psychological problem. Review our Bedwetting section. In particular, you want to make sure that urinary tract infections are not the cause. It is possible for infections of the bladder and kidneys to cause no symptoms other than wetting; but over the years these infections can cause very serious kidney damage. That is why testing for urine infections is very important.
That said it's most likely that there is no medical or developmental problem. Your daughter's priorities may simply be different from yours. Let her know that you think she is big enough to learn to stay dry all day long and that you really want her to try to do so.
Go with her to a card store or toy store and let her pick out some really terrific stickers. Make a sticker chart (a calendar, with enough room for two stickers on each day). Post it on the refrigerator at her eye height. Let her know that she will earn one sticker for every morning she is dry and one for every afternoon. Make adding the sticker a cause for celebration.
Since she is already able to stay dry some of the time, with a little extra motivation she should be able to stay dry all of the time (or almost all of the time: since accidents will happen).
Try not to punish, nag, or remind your daughter too much (a gentle reminder in the spirit of helpfulness is OK). Remain optimistic. Your daughter will catch your positive spirit and respond positively to it.— by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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