Dr. Robert Needlman
Specialist in pediatric behavior and development.
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 Ask Dr. Needlman
Helping Infants Learn to Entertain Themselves | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Needlman,
We have a wonderful nanny who takes care of our 3+ month old for 10+ hours per day. She is very attentive to him, and he is a very happy baby. We wonder if we should be concerned that he's getting too much attention and needs more time to play by himself. We have read that you can't give too much love/attention to an infant, but that as he approaches one year, we might want to encourage him to play more by himself. What guidance, if any, should we give to her?— Happy Baby in Burlingame, CA | | | ANSWER |
May 29, 2001 | | | Dear Happy Baby,
Your question shows that you are well tuned-in to your baby's needs. Primarily, he needs loving attention. As a secondary issue, he needs to learn how to entertain and console himself. To do this, he has to be allowed to experience small amounts of boredom and frustration. The questions are, of course, how soon and how much?
There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question. Instead, a sensitive caregiver starts slow, and gradually increases the amount of time the baby is left on his own, according to the baby's ability to handle the challenge. At three months, some babies do well with an entertaining mobile to watch, or music to listen to, for several minutes. Others need more frequent human contact. By a year, as you suggest, many babies can manage 20 minutes or more, and some positively enjoy quiet time alone. — by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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