Dr. Robert Needlman
Specialist in pediatric behavior and development.
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 Ask Dr. Needlman
An Energetic and Destructive One-Year-Old | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Needlman,
My one-year-old child is never at peace. Whenever a toy is given to him, he's able to break it or tear it up. What is his problem? Is it natural?
— Malika in United Arab Emirates | | | ANSWER |
January 28, 2001 | | | Dear Malika,
Actually, many one-year-olds are very busy and very tough on their toys. It's not that they want to destroy them--they simply are interested in seeing how things change when you hit them or pull them apart. It's just their natural curiosity and way of exploring the world.
You might think about finding some very simple unbreakable toys (for example, an old pot or a thick plastic pail). Don't buy brand-new toys; buy used ones instead. Your child will be just as happy with them. Just be careful that he can't break off pieces that are little enough to choke on!
I realize, however, that it is a problem when a child's natural temperament (highly energetic, in your son's case) doesn't fit well with what his parent wants (perhaps a quieter and more placid child.) You can't make an active child into a calm one, but you can give him plenty of safe, appropriate outlets for his energy--letting him play on climbing structures, bang on pots with a wooden spoon, or run around outside, for instance.
You also might hire an energetic but responsible teenager to spend time with him each week. It probably won't cost too much, and it will be money well spent. Your boy will be able to look forward to some high-energy playing with someone who can really get into it, and you'll be able to look forward to a few quiet moments. When you come back together, you and your son will both be more ready to enjoy each other.— by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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