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 Ask Dr. Jana
Having Children Close Together | | | QUESTION | | | Dear Dr. Jana,
My son is a year old, and we want to have another child. Is it too soon?
— Andrea in El Dorado, KS | | | ANSWER |
April 26, 2001 | | | Dear Andrea,
It is easy for me to make the general statement that it is not too soon to have another child--having taken care of many families whose children were close together in age (not to mention having had three children of my own over the course of three-and-a-half years).
From a physical standpoint, it is considered a perfectly reasonable time to become pregnant again, but you should take into account your own situation and check with your doctor to make sure that you are physically ready.
What most people wonder about is how bringing home a new baby will effect their firstborn and how they will be able to manage with two young children when keeping up with one toddler is already a challenge. As you make your decision, however, you should consider your family's situation and weigh the benefits against the challenges.
There is no question that there are challenges to having children close together. Having a newborn at home--with all that entails--does not exactly leave you well-rested and ready to chase around an active toddler. And many toddlers see a new baby as an intruder who takes away their parent's undivided attention. That said, there are some simple things you can do to prepare your first-born for a new baby's arrival as well as simple ways to involve him once your new baby does arrive that will make him feel important and loved. Even though time will be scarce for a while, simply setting aside a few minutes of one-on-one time with your toddler to keep up his favorite routines can also make the transition smoother.
Let me also assure you that there are benefits. Most toddlers, even those who don't take kindly to their new sibling's arrival at first, soon grow to love the baby and settle into the new routine over time. As the baby becomes more active (and interactive), siblings who are close together in age can often share a very special bond. While the early years may seem like a juggle, you should remember to think beyond the early years. With similar interests and abilities, siblings close in age often end up having a built-in best friend.
And once you're past the rigors of having two young children, having two older children who are close in age can be a real advantage for everything from planning family activities to figuring out work schedules and career plans.— by Laura Jana, M.D., F.A.A.P. |
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