 | Hi there.
Here is my dilemna. I have a sister, and my husband has a sister. Both of us are VERY close with our sisters. I am also extremely close with my sister-in-law - I love her like she was my own sister. Anyway, if I would have had twins, my sister would have been a Godmother, and my SIL would have been one. Well, I didn't - I only had one!
Some more insight: My husband's family is Catholic, my side of the family is not. I converted to be Catholic before we got married. My family was very supportive though, etc., because none of my family goes to church, etc...., so they didn't care one way or another!
Anyway, after much discussion, and alot of soulsearching, I had to decide who would make a better Godmother for my child... So, I decided that his sister would make a better Godmother, so that is who we chose.
I tried to explain to my sister that I loved her more than anything, etc., but we had to pick one, so we picked my SIL, but Godwilling, we would have another baby, and if we did, she would definitely be the Godmother to that one.
As I said, I knew she would be hurt, but it has gone way, way beyond that. She has disowned me. (I am 37, and she is 46 and a mom of 2). My daughter was born November 1st (all Saints day!), and her babtism was in the middle of December. She has not spoken to me since the beginning of December, and she also did not go to my daughter's baptism. I called her and told her that even though she was angry with me, that she should still go to my daughter's baptism, etc., that my daughter would want her Auntie there, etc. Well, my daughter is now 8-1/2 months old, and my sister has only seen her 3 times (at holidays at my moms) and only for a couple hours each time. She doesn't ask how she is doing, ask to hold her, etc.. My sister told me that my daughter would know that she is loved by her. Well, how could she when she doesn't even know her?
This is very painful for me, especially when I am putting together a picture collage, and there are no pictures with my daughter and sister. I know my sister is hurt, etc., but she is the one that is missing out on such wonderful things my daughter is doing, etc.
I had tried several times initially with no luck, so now I don't know what to do....
We were so very close, and this does pain me so very deeply on one side of the coin. And then on the other side, it makes me so very mad and angry myself. I continue to try and be the better person by sending her updates of my daughter (her 3-month and 6-month picture). I am taking her for her 9-month pictures soon, and I honestly am debating if I should even bother... I am getting bitter by the second. Several of my friends say that they wouldn't send her pictures of my daughter if they were me, but again, I am sending them out as if my daughter was sending them out, ya know?
I am so confused, and want to make a decision one way or another... Any suggestions, comments, ???
Thanks so very much. Sorry for the long read.
Michelle |
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