 | I'm trying to find a way to be a better parent to my daughter. She is 11 and I feel like she's headed in the wrong direction. I blame myself for the most part, but I also realize she has to take some responsibility for her actions, too.
The most recent issue I have with her is cursing. She doesn't curse at me, but she does it outside with friends. What worries me is that it's getting serious...the other day my brother was over. She argued with him over the t.v and cursed at him. This is her uncle and Godfather and she showed no respect at all.
She also has a 12 yr old cousin who I know she adores. It's my sister's daughter. When they were visting one day, my daughter put on some music which neither my sister nor myself approve of. My sister found out after they got home, and the next day she confronted my daughter about it on the phone-basically telling her that neither one of them should listen to that music-it's not appropriate for them. First of all my daughter completely denied it to my sister. Then she asked to speak to her cousin. The first thing she says is "what the hell did you tell her???" My niece was shocked--she's very soft-spoken and has never spoken that way to my daughter. This understandably upset her and my sister very much. But when my sister tried to explain that she can't speak this way to people , my daughter's attitude right away is that everyone in her family hates her.
It's like she has no remorse for what she does or says---if someone call her on it, she starts feeling sorry for herself. When she gets punished for doing these things-she blames the people who "got her in trouble" for ruining her life.
It's a constant battle with her---she argues with me all the time. when she's asked to give her help, I get eye rolling or smart remarks. I know I don't always handle the situation well. Frustration builds up and I start yelling and arguing back. I know she feels she doesn't get the attetion she should and it's probably true. I work full time and also have two other sons, 2 & 3. I'm trying to do the best I can but unfortunately there's only 24 hours in a day.
She's getting older now and the problems are going to get bigger. She's already started talking about boys.She has crushes, she's in love...what's scaring me is I hear her talking about wanting to kiss someone---she used the term "french kiss"...how do I deal with that??? She's only 11 !!!
Any advice would be greatly appreciated---on how to help her---how to help myself do better---ANYTHING!
Thanks.... |
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