Sexual addiction

November 22, 2009

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AUTHOR:

Dazey

DATE: 10/20/02 8:59pm

SUBJECT:

Sexual addiction

Although this is not related to children directly it has had an impact on them indirectly (my 17 year old especially). I have recently asked my partner (not my childrens father)of 2 and half years to move out. I have been to a counsellor about this issue but apart from that I have had nobody to talk too. About 9 months into our relationship our sex life tapered off and I put it down to him having a low libido. We talked about it and he said no it was just stress from his job etc, he wasn't actually aware how much it had slowed up. Things improved for a while then it started again. I was aware that he had an interest in porn but when I brought up the subject of our fading sex life again he admitted that he was masturbating twice sometimes three times a day. I was shocked. Then I found out about the pornography. He said that he liked looking at them and that he would f*** each one in his head. I was devastated and told him that to me it was as if he was having an affair. He couldn't get his head around that and kept saying they are not real. We went to counselling and discovered that he was inappropriately introduced to sex at 5 years old (he believes though that this really has no bearing on his habits now). He promised that he would stop downloading porn...and just to give you an idea of the extent of the problem he had over 5000 saved pics. i found myself unable to trust him and started constantly checking up on him, which I absolutely hated about myself but it became a compulsion. After the third time of finding he had accessed porn sites I asked him to leave. I don't have a problem with soft porn if it is being used as visual stimulation between consenting adults. It was the secrets and lies and the waiting until everyone was out of the house that really got to me. He asked me to help him and even tried to blame me saying I was not adventurous enough (major denial). What i would like to know is if anybody out there in the blue nowhere has encountered this problem and what did they do about it? I was shattered when I found out the depth of his addiction (yes it is classed as an addiction) and doubted myself for a while. It took me a while to realise I was not part of the problem and I couldn't be part of the solution. My 17 year old was obviously aware of my ex-partners pre-dilection as he asked one day when I was doing a check if I was looking for porn. I invite any comments or helpful suggestions so I can better understand what happen to me so I don't repeat it.

MESSAGES

Sexual addiction

Dazey

10/20/02 08:59pm

Re: Sexual addiction

mistyrose73

10/27/02 04:05pm

Re: Sexual addiction

Dazey

10/29/02 01:52am

Re: Sexual addiction

Tesswill

11/03/03 09:42pm

Re: Sexual addiction

dovekiss99

01/26/04 10:26pm

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