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|  PREVIOUS MESSAGE | | | | | | AUTHOR: | Step-Mom-To-Be | DATE: 07/17/02 10:25am | | SUBJECT: |  Re: single dad, 8 yr old son, and ex-wife's death | | IN REPLY TO: single dad, 8 yr old son, and ex-wife's death
AUTHOR: dad_beauregard | | | Death is terribly comlicated for a child so young to understand. But, on the other hand, I can see where you might want to let him know. While I have no justification for this, my gut feeling is that, unless he asks you, you should wait until he is a little older to tell him. However, if he does ask you, then I think that you should tell him the truth, as softly as you can.
In either case, I think that when you do tell him, you should leave out as much of the pain and negativity of the custody battle as you can...because at this point, your memory of her is all that he will ever have. While she may not have been the best mother (which I am assuming, as she lost custody rights), she was his biological mother. And if he were to think badly of her, it may really damage his self-esteem and self-worth.
Also, when you do tell him, make sure that you remind him of how much you love him, and let him know that you are willing to talk about it with him whenever he wants...even if this is hard for you, it may take awhile for him to sort out his feelings.
Good luck! | |  | |
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