 | We live in a society today in which especially during the latter part of the century preceding the year 2000 there has been a strong movement toward unisex. Contradictory to this movement is the evidence that can be observed in children growing up, especially the extreme difference in playing. Girls automatically gravitate toward a playing mode that prepares them for motherhood in their adult life while boys by their methods of playing are being prepared to be protector and providers. The result is that there are many functions in today's society that are viewed to be gender neutral but in reality are contradictory to the way our brains are wired.
Another factor is that men do have more physical strength and energy than women but I believe that a man's energy is used up quicker and therefore it is earlier in the day that they feel the need to rest from their labor. Women are in many other ways stronger than men and even though they have less energy it seems to last longer. I can also understand that to a woman who is overworked, stressed out and exhausted these energy differences may be completely unrecognizable.
The bottom line is that you do need help. I have a few suggestions that may help but because there are so many variables involved, there is to my knowledge no single solution that is appropriate for everyone. There is a possibility that your husband may have a health problem that prevents him from being motivated. Even mild depression that can result from many different causes that can range from environmental to biochemical, kinds of foods, eating habits, drinking enough water, enough quality sleep and lack of exercise can diminish a person's energy and motivation. If health is not a problem it may be possible for him to work extra time at his job or find another part time job that would enable you to hire some responsible and reliable person to help in your home.
One of the most common complaints that I have heard from women in homes where both the husband and wife are working is that the woman has to do all the house work as well as her full time job. I have always believed that if both are out in the work force they should hire someone to do the work in the house that they do not want to do or don't have enough energy left to do. I predict that this suggestion would be countered by many that they can't afford it. I would say that in most but not all cases the reason that they can't afford it is the same reason that they are both working. That reason is that they are both greedy to live a more costly lifestyle and have extra things or new things that they don't need. Their want list is much greater than their need list. Some times I hear people criticize other people that have wealth. Their point of criticism is about how cheap they are when they could afford to be more extravagant.
My best friend has well over a million dollar net worth, self made. He was best man at my wedding. At that time his net worth would have been just under a million. He bought a new suit to be best man at my wedding. He was about 40 years old and that was the very first suit that he ever owned. Yesterday I talked to him on the phone. We live 1800 miles apart. He told me that his father criticized him because he started living in a motor home that he bought at a deal. Since he already had the motor home he realized that he could rent out the house that he was living in for $700.
I admire your stand on abortion and I also agree. I sincerely hope that you find a solution that works for you. |
PREVIOUS MESSAGE
PREVIOUS DISCUSSION