 | I have 2 children, a boy, 11 and girl, 9. Their father and I both love them dearly and try to be the best parents we know how. We treat them both equally and try to raise them to be respectable people. For the most part they are good kids but I have one major concern. From the moment they get up in the morning right up until bedtime they argue about the pettiest things. Alot of times it progresses to rip roaring, all out, fist fights and if their father or I don't intervene quickly, someone gets hurt. This has been ongoing since about school age and it seems to have gotten worse the older they get. Their father and I rarely argue, but if we do, we don't do so in front of them. So I can't understand why they are so hostile towards each other. As I stated earlier we treat them both equally. We spend quality time with both of them, We praise them for a job well done. If we buy one child a material object, we are sure to buy something for the other. We usually listen to them attentively if they want to express a problem they are having with school, friends, etc. So I'm pretty sure that the fighting is not caused by the old "you love her/him more than you love me" syndrom.
We have tried everything from talking to them separately, talking to them together, grounding them, sending them to their rooms, letting them fight it out, and yes, spanking them. Their father and I are at our wits end, and for me (I am the one who is around them more often as I work only part time outside the home), it's gotten to the point where I don't even want to be around them anymore. Because of this fighting between the two of them my life has become a constant chaos and my days end in tears. I am tense to the point of utter exhaustion and there are days where my blood pressure rises so high I actually see stars.
Please help,
frustrated to tears
|
PREVIOUS DISCUSSION