 | I was only 23 when I got my tubes tied. I was reading all the messages of women who have done the same thing and wish they hadn't. Some were forced to and some had it done from being in such a horrid relationship. Now all of them, including me, wish we had never had it done. I was in a relationship that was going down hill fast...he wasn't abusive..just a cheat. I had my second child and had complications so I went back around 6-8 weeks later and had them done. I was still in the mental state that I wasn't having anymore because I was raising two all by myself and I didn't even really think about the future and how I would feel 2, 5,or 11 years down the road. NO one told me that I might regret it! Noone even brought up reasons not to have it done. I wish someone had brought doubt into my mind!! I had what they called the band method. No burning or cutting. My sister who is a nurse and has worked in the New Born Nursery for almost 30 years told me that the bands could possible pop off if you gone alot of weight or slip off if you lose alot of weight. I had mine tied Jan of '93--just a little over a eleven years. I am now married to such a good man and even though he said he didn't care that I couldn't have anymore, I can see in his eyes that he would love one. I haven't had a period since Dec 30 2002. I should have started more than 2 weeks ago and am anxiously hoping that I would be but I have been experiencing some stress and I know things like stress, medications, change in diet etc. can sometimes delay your period. I guess if I don't start in a couple of weeks then I will have a test ran. I do ultrasound and I love scanning these little bundles of joy on their way into the world. I don't know if I am but If I am I will gladly take on the responsibility of being pregnant. I had felt for so long that I was the only woman who had regretted tying her tubes. Now I know that I am just one of many. For what ever reason, we do it and then we look back and hind sight is so 20/20. I did it because I was so hurt and was so upset that my relationship didn't work out. I always told myself that If I met someone to marry, he would have to just understand my predicament and move on. My husband understood why I had mine tied and says he is fine with it but I can tell that he would love to have one of his very own. It angers me in a way to think of all of us who have had tubals forced upon us or doing it by thinking it was the right thing to do. I know one thing, If I ever meet someone who is going to have it done, I will talk to her and tell her to make sure she never ever wants another baby because this is heart breaking. All of us that regret it and had it done for reasons that envolve alot of emotion (weren't we all emotional at the time??),..we need to empower the ones that are debating this procedure so they don't have to feel like we do. I think If I had waited a few more months or even a year, I would not have had my tubes tied but practiced safe sex or abstained until the right man came along. Anyway, would love to meet anyone and become friends from this site. e mail me anytime...dedami@hotmail.com. Also, I am a true believer that if God wants us to have another child, it will be. Keep praying if you want another baby after a tubal. Nothing stands in the way of the Lord's devine plans..NOTHING!!! |
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