 | I now hate the holidays , my sister is older than I by 3 years she has gone out with all my ex- boyfriends I break up with them and then she goes right out with them, her last boyfriend she was sleeping with him when I was going out with him, him and I broke up and she stayed with him for years they have a child together I got over it in time. Now she is going out with my first they to have a child together. I mentioned he was my first, he raped me when I was 15 she knew about this my whole did, I have to put on a fake smile when I go to my parents house and they are there, now thanksgiving is coming up and I have to see them I am really dreading it, I told my mom that some of memory that I blocked is coming back since raped me and I really don't want to go I told her I would stop after they left, she said oh well your father has not been feeling well you will put him in his grave, so I have to go, I really can't take much more this.. I just need someone to listen to really listen. |
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