 | What you wrote sounds a lot like what my son was doing less than a month ago. He is an only child, so I do not know to what extent having an older sibling has an affect on your situation.
My life was a mess. I had just moved in. The house was a wreck because I hadn't unpacked very much, but what little I had unpacked got destroyed constantly by my son. He hated brushing his teeth. He would react to it as though we were hurting him. Baths made him upset. And forget trying to put him into bed at night. Even with a crib tent, he got out in a flash.
What did I do? Well, I just bite the bullet and cleaned one room per day (his room first). Unpacked and got the house looking decent. I kid-proofed his room and put out his toys he hasn't seen in a while. I played children songs in the background.
I converted his (useless) crib to a toddler bed since the crib wasn't keeping him in anyways.
As for brushing his teeth, I got a foot stool for him, so he can see the sink like mommy and daddy. I showed him how to spit when he brushes his teeth and he though that was so funny. He gets to spit when he brushes his teeth. I brush for as long as he lets me then give him the tooth brush. He likes to suck the tooth paste off then spit in the sink, but he will run the toothbrush under the water and brush his teeth for a little while. It is getting better each time.
I made a chart for his potty training. He gts stickers when he goes potty. He loves to pick out his own sticker. It takes him a few minutes to decide which one he wants.
When he knocks things over without playing with hem, I sit down next to the mess, pull him on my lap affectionatly, and ask him to help me pick the toys up. I show him how to do it, then explain very specifically what I want him to do, "ok, pick up the green monkey and put it in the purple basket" (Hey, I can teach him colors while teaching him to pick up!!!) I give him the time to do it, and I end up doing most of the work, but the point is, he knows that when he makes a mess, he will have to help clean it up. Today, I told him to pick up his legoes, and he did. I didn't help him at all. I had to keep eminding him that we were cleaning them up and not playing with them, but he did eventually get them all picked up. This is an improvement.
Consistancy and calmness! Consistancy and calmness! Consistancy and calmness!
When I say calmness, I do not just mean you. I also mean the envirnment has to be calm as well. If the house is a wreck with a T.V. going on in one room and lights on in every room of the house with noises going on everywhere, my son will go bonkers. It is probably easier for me since I only have one child, so I can give my whole attention to him and what he is doing. You may have to be more creative.
My husband came up with a splendid idea tonight over dinner. When we have older children, we are going to use a monthly MVP of the family award as an incentive to improve oneself and strive to be great. You can decide what is important to you and your family. For us, we decided that just doing the chores doesn't deserve the MVP award. If the kid does something truely note-worthy, like visit a nursing home or read an extra-curricular book or brings a friend to church, then that kid gets an MVP award and gets to do something special that month. More than one person can be an MVP. This takes the competition out of it. Anyone can be an MVP if the kid just does something great.
Anyways, got off the subject there, but maybe it can be helpful.
Veronica |
PREVIOUS MESSAGE
PREVIOUS DISCUSSION