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| |    The Meaning of Stress by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. reviewed by Laura Jana, M.D., F.A.A.P. Parents of adolescents are understandably concerned about stress, both their childrewn's and their own. Certainly, stress is the topic of many conversations: We talk about the stress of balancing work and home life, the stress of traffic jams, the stress of living in a hurried-up society, and even the stress of dealing with a crying or whining child. We look for "stress reduction" on faraway beaches, in meditation classes, or (perhaps more than we should) with alcohol and other substances. As parents we all know what it feels like to be stressed out. We worry about the toll that all this stress will take on us and our children. But for all the talk, many people have a hard time understanding what, exactly, stress is. Stress is a feeling, but not really an emotion in its own right. Instead, it seems to be a common aspect of many different emotions, including frustration, anger, worry, fear, sadness, and even despair. There is also, clearly, a physical aspect to stress. I feel stress in my chest; you may feel it in the pit of your stomach, or in your jaw from clenching your teeth. What's more, we still don't know precisely where stress comes from. If you think about it, the concept of stress implies that there is a cause for the stress that resides outside the person feeling it. On the other hand, events that are very nerve-racking for one person may not be at all stressful for another, which raises the question: Is stress the emotional byproduct of an outside action or event, or is it a response that is particular to a certain type of person (or personality)? Finally, is stress always a bad thing? And if not, what is the difference between good stress and bad stress? A lot of these questions remain unanswered, even though psychologists and doctors have been researching stress and its effects for nearly 200 years. Still, as you think about stress in your own life, and in your children's, you may find some of the scientific insights not only surprising, but also useful. A physical response For many years, scientists have known that the body responds to threatening situations by releasing certain stress hormones--chiefly, adrenaline and cortisol--that trigger the so-called fight-or-flight response. As pulse and blood pressure rise, blood sugar also goes up, the breath quickens, bringing in more oxygen, and blood flow shifts toward the limbs and the brain and away from the stomach and intestines. Muscles tense, and attention narrows to a sharp focus. In small doses, stress helps with concentration and endurance (think of doing a long, hard math test). The fight-or-flight response literally is a lifesaver for animals (and people) that have to face predators on a daily basis. In everyday life, however, it can be downright inconvenient, or worse. Part of the problem is that the threat-response system often works too well. In the brain, a special neural connection is forged between the threatening stimulus (the sight of a mugger's mask, for example) and this response system so that the next time the same stimulus shows up, the response can be even faster. This special connection, however, also means that every time you see something like the threatening stimulus (a different face mask, for example), you may find yourself responding with a completely useless stress response. Threatening images have a direct physical effect on the body. But the opposite is also true: Pleasant thoughts and safe images can trigger a physical, as well as psychological, relaxation response, with decreased muscle tension, decreased heart rate, and improved blood flow to the intestines and stomach (reducing stress-related abdominal pain). And just as the body stress response increases with repeated exposure, the relaxation response also grows stronger and faster the more one practices relaxing. Effects of stress over time Fight-or-flight is the body's response to a sudden, severe stress. But smaller, everyday stresses, like the stress of living in a noisy apartment or having to sit for hours in traffic each day, also cause the same hormones to be released, only on a smaller scale. And although the response is less dramatic, the stresses can add up. So, if one day you're late for work, your car won't start, your child starts crying, and your dog runs away, the combined effect may be the same as one larger stress. Stresses that continue day after day may have worse effects than if there is time to relax and recover in between. One widely accepted theory holds that chronic stress can be a cause of depression. Resiliency as a factor Why do some people seem to be better than others at handling stressful situations? One answer is resiliency. Resiliency is a quality of something--girders in a bridge, for example--that allows it to bend without breaking and then snap back to its original form. Similarly, in people, resilience is the ability to experience stress without getting bent out of shape. Resilient people tend to have a more positive outlook on life, just as a matter of temperament, and they often have specific relationships with other people that help them to cope with stress. For example, long-term studies of children growing up under tough social circumstances have found that children who have one adult who consistently supports them and believes in them are the ones who end up doing well in life. They are resilient. Certainly, having good friends can bolster one's resiliency a great deal. Interestingly, mice and other mammals who receive gentle, attentive care from their mothers during infancy are much more resilient to stress than those that do not. It's likely that the same process is at work in humans. Loving care at an early age appears to build reserves of resiliency that people can draw on in later life. For additional perspectives on stress, see our program on coping with crisis and the article "Adolescent Stress: What to Do."
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