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| |    Toilet Training: How Are Boys Different from Girls? by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. reviewed by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. There's a common notion that girls toilet train faster than boys. That perception does, in fact, turn out to be true, but it raises other questions: How much faster? Why? And how does it affect how you train a boy versus a girl? How much faster? Girls are faster, but not by a lot. On average, girls seem to be about six months ahead. For example, in a recent New Jersey study, 70 percent of girls were fully trained (urine and stool) during the day by age three years, compared to 51 percent of boys. Six months later, 83 percent of the boys were trained, but the girls were up to 95 percent. And six months after that, the boys caught up to 95 percent, but the girls were at 100 percent. Another study from Switzerland was pretty much the same: 82 percent of girls had complete bowel control by three, compared to 54 percent of boys (but by age four, the boys had pretty much caught up with their female peers). Overall, between 1968 and 1999, six large studies, representing more than 3,500 children, found that girls take control of their bowels and bladders earlier. Why are girls faster? No one knows for sure, though there are some interesting possibilities. Girls also tend to be faster in language development. The peak years for toilet mastery, between about 18 months and 36 months, are also peak years for language learning. Perhaps girls have an edge in toilet training because they can assert their independence with words, rather than having to demonstrate it by refusing to use the potty. Also, one researcher found that girls who start training earlier tend to finish earlier, but this wasn't true of boys. With boys, the determining factor seemed to be their neurological maturity (based on their sleep patterns). Perhaps this means that neurological immaturity limits how quickly some boys can gain control over toileting, no matter how early they start training. What you can do Even though boys on average are a bit slower to master toilet training, that doesn't mean that yourson necessarily will be. Lots of other factors go into a child's readiness to learn: his verbal ability, his desire to please (or to do what his older sibling can do), and his neurological maturity, for example. However, if your boy seems to be taking an especially long time getting the hang of toilet training, perhaps it is because he is a boy (after all, there is some comfort to be had in knowing the statistics I have laid out for you-i.e., that only about half of boys are toilet trained by the age of three years). The answer: Take a break and try again in a month or two. Toilet training can be frustrating, but if you can keep a relaxed attitude, it helps your child feel confident that in time he'll be able to master this important skill. Click here to join the discussion on Toilet Training.
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