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 Parties for Younger Teens
 by Penny Warner reviewed by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. Between the ages of 13 and 15 years old, fledgling teenagers usually view birthday parties as coming-of-age celebrations to be shared with a few friends or just family. If the teens do decide to have a big party, they like to take over the reins from their parents and make their own decisions about the event. Take your child seriously, talk over her ideas, and let her know if there are any that just aren't feasible--and why. Then stand back and let her make most of the arrangements, stepping in when necessary. You'll need to exercise a bit of tact here, since young teenagers are zealous about wanting independence but still don't have the maturity to anticipate and handle every detail and situation.
Here are some points to keep in mind:- If your young teen doesn't want a formal party to celebrate this milestone, you might suggest a slumber party or an outing to somewhere special for a few good friends. You might take the teens to a fancy (or fun) restaurant for dinner, a ballgame or another sporting event, or perhaps a movie, play, or rock concert.
- If your teen lobbies for a larger party at an outside venue, ice- or roller-skating rinks, indoor soccer facilities, or swimming pools usually offer reasonably priced party packages. She also might like the idea of a rock'n'roll bowling party that some alleys hold on weekend nights, often complete with a heart-thumping sound system, glittering disco balls, and even smoke machines. If the guest list is long or the budget tight, you don't have to spend a fortune to have a good time--invite the kids to the beach, lake, or park for a picnic and activities such as swimming, volleyball, or a game of Frisbee.
- Even with the best-behaved young teens, there are still supervision issues to consider. Parents definitely need to remain at home (or wherever the party is held) during the event, but they usually can stay well in the background and just check on the partygoers briefly from time to time.
- Especially if you opt for the home party route, remind your teen to keep the number of guests reasonable--between 6 to 12 is best. Lay out the ground rules (such as the bedrooms are off limits at mixed-gender parties, no horsing around the pool, etc.) at the start of the party so the guests are clear about the boundaries.
- If you're hosting a party at home, make sure that there's plenty to do so the kids don't get bored and mischievous--maybe music and dancing, trivia or Pictionary contests, sporting activities like swimming or playing basketball, darts, foosball, pool, or ping-pong. Stock up on teen-pleasing videos in case the kids seem to need a little downtime.
- Have plenty of fun and healthy foods on hand. Teens have prodigious appetites and they love the usual snack foods-popcorn, chips, sodas, burgers, fries, etc. Be sure to set out some healthier offerings as well--cut-up pieces or fruit or vegetables with dipping sauce, lemonade, little sandwiches, etc. And make-your-own mini pizzas or ice-cream sundaes always are popular.
- As far as favors are concerned, teens usually don't expect them any more, so this is one place where you can save a little money.
- Don't forget the camera. Teens may roll their eyes when a doting mom or dad pulls out the point-and-shoot, but they still like looking at the pictures later. And, just like younger kids, teens usually enjoy candid--or even goofy--Polaroid pictures of themselves (which they can take home as souvenirs) or being videotaped and watching their antics at the end of the party. You also might hand out a few disposable cameras and let the kids click away.


 |  Created June 08, 2001 Reviewed June 11, 2001
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