 | ||
|
| |    Duties and Responsibilities by Dr. Benjamin Spock reviewed by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. Adapted from Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care How do children learn to perform various duties? By their very nature, they start out feeling that dressing themselves, brushing their teeth, sweeping, and putting things away are exciting and grown-up things to do. If their parents succeed in keeping on good terms with them as they grow older, they will enjoy going on errands, carrying packages, and raking the lawn, because they still want to have a part in important jobs and to please their mothers and fathers. By age two they can be expected to go through the motions of picking up their playthings. By three years they should be given such small chores as helping to set the table or emptying the wastebaskets, even though these tasks don't save parents much work. By seven or eight they should be carrying out genuinely useful jobs each day. No one is able to bring up their children so that they will be cooperative 100 percent of the time. But if we realize that children want to be helpful, we are less likely to make household tasks sound unpleasant or to assign them when we're feeling irritable. Children can't always be expected to carry out their responsibilities dutifully--even at 15 years old. (Most adults lapse into irresponsibility at times, too.) They have to be reminded. If you can find the patience, try to make the reminder matter-of-fact and polite, as if you were speaking to an adult. It's the nagging, belittling tone that kills all pride in a job. It also helps a lot to assign children tasks that they can do in the company of other members of the family, whether it's drying the dishes or mowing the lawn. Then the grown-up-ness of the task and the fun of helping will spur them on. Some parents believe in paying children money for doing chores, or they let the children know that their allowance is payment for chores. But paying, like nagging, conveys that the chore itself is unpleasant and not rewarding in itself. Sincere but simple thanks and recognition for a job well done is a strong motivator. The expectation that everyone in the family needs to pitch in to get the work of the family done conveys the idea that chores are a way of belonging and contributing to the family's well-being.
| |  | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| About Us |
Contact Us |
Our Partners Privacy Policy | Ethics | Advertising Policy | Terms of Service © Copyright 2004 The Dr. Spock Company. All Rights Reserved. THIS SITE DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE. The information drSpock.com
provides is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for
professional medical advice. Always seek the advice of your health care
professional if you have a specific health concern. Mention or advertisement
of any product, service, or brand does not constitute endorsement, guarantee,
or recommendation by The Dr. Spock Company. Please read our full
Terms of Service. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
