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Practical Tips for Museum-Going Families

by Gloria Needlman and Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P.
reviewed by Laura Jana, M.D., F.A.A.P.
Keep safety in mind.
Getting lost in a museum can be frightening for everyone. With very young children, you'll probably want to be holding hands. For older and more independent children, you can explain, "We need to be able to see each other all the time." Since many museums use different colored carpeting or flooring to indicate the boundaries between exhibits, you may be able to use this as a guide for your child: "Go anywhere you want, as long as you stay on this blue carpet."

With older children, it makes sense to review "what if" plans, in case you do become separated. There are really only two rules that your child needs to know: Go right to a guard and ask for help. And never, under any circumstances, leave the building alone or with another adult.

Pay attention to the clock.
Timing is very important. Mornings are usually less crowded. Plus having a rested and fed child will add to everyone's enjoyment. (Speaking of food, you might want to carry a small snack with you in case the line for the cafeteria is super long.)

The length of time you should spend in the museum depends on the age of your child. Even in a museum that encourages active play and exploration, an hour to an hour and a half is the maximum for even a very attentive preschooler. In a more traditional museum where most of the activity is standing and looking, you might plan to spend a pleasant 30 minutes rather than a frustrating and unhappy 60. It is far better to leave before your child reaches the point of no return. Make "less is better" your museum motto.

Decide in advance how to survive the gift shop.
Museum gift shops can be full of wonderful things, and it's exciting to think that they are for sale. But they can also be frustrating for children, not to mention expensive. What a shame it would be to ruin a fun visit with a gift-shop fight!

It's often helpful to set up expectations ahead of time. You might decide that you are only window-shopping on this trip. It's easy for a child to understand "We're only looking; we're not buying anything today." A simple, factual statement like this leaves little room for disappointment or argument. If you do set up this expectation, it's important that you stick with it, even if you see something that you want to buy, or if your child whines or cajoles ever so much. If you give in once, it's reasonable for your child to conclude that you don't really mean it when you say "window-shopping only."

Or, you might set a price limit: "We can only spend $4. If there's something that costs more, we aren't going to buy it, even if we want it a lot." Children need to learn that it's OK to want something but not to get it right away.

If you need to say no, it helps to let your child know that you understand how she feels. You might also offer a possible consolation: "I know you really want that expensive dinosaur model, but we can't buy it now. Maybe it can be a birthday present." If you use the "birthday present" strategy, however, you need to be prepared (at least some of the time) to follow through on your promise.

Do your best to leave on a happy note.
It's best to leave while your child is still having fun. That strategy avoids the dreaded "meltdown," although it presents its own challenges. Playing games helps: How many signs can you find on the way to the door? How many people you pass are wearing boots? Also, plan ahead--for example, pick an exhibit near the exit, and decide that you'll leave right after that one. Announce that you'll be leaving in 10 minutes; then give a reminder at 5 minutes and again at 2 minutes.

Faced with a stubborn or dawdling child, desperate parents sometimes resort to threats. The worst of these is the threat to leave the child behind. This is sure to scare a young child, because all children are afraid of being abandoned. However, it's not guaranteed to make the child speed up! If necessary, simply take your child by the hand and pull her gently to the door. If you can do this with a mild smile on your face while promising that you'll come back soon, all the better.
 RELATED INFORMATION
*  Little Scientists: How Young Children Think
*  Museums


Created February 18, 2001
Reviewed February 21, 2001
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