Self-Care for Preteens and Teens

November 21, 2009

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Self-Care for Preteens and Teens

by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P.
reviewed by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P.

It's tempting to think that as children grow older, they become more and more capable of caring for themselves. The idea of seven- and eight-year-old children at home alone for an entire afternoon makes many parents uncomfortable, but these same parents may believe that surely by age 12 or 13, a child should be capable of managing by himself.

The reality is that self-care has many of the same risks for preteens and teenagers as it does for younger children--and that, with a little preparation and diligence, it also can be a positive experience that promotes independence.

While studies on younger children in latchkey situations have mixed results (some studies find a variety of problems, while others do not), the studies about teenagers have many findings in common. On the whole, older children left to care for themselves are more likely to use alcohol, cigarettes, and drugs, and are more likely to give in to peer pressure to take other risks, such as irresponsible sexual behavior.

For any particular child, the risks of self-care depend on a number of factors:

Your child's personality is of special importance. A level-headed, responsible child is safer left alone than a rebellious daredevil. On the other hand, a shy or tentative child may be at more risk of isolation and loneliness. A child who is academically self-motivated and who enjoys studying is less likely to become bored in the afternoons than is a child for whom homework is a distasteful chore.

The degree of parental supervision is important. Preteens and teens who know that they are expected to be at home without a lot of friends over and that their parents will call once or twice in the course of the afternoon are less likely to stray far out of line.

Children who hang out at a friend's house or on the street without having a specific location known to their parents are more likely to engage in risky behavior.

The number of hours per week of self-care seems to be important. In one study of eighth-grade children, those in self-care for 11 or more hours a week had nearly twice the levels of risk-taking, family conflict, substance use, and anger towards parents.

The total amount of self-care over the years is also a factor. Teens and preteens who began self-care when they were still in elementary school may have greater risk-taking behaviors than those who began when they were older.

This is not to say that preteens and teenagers shouldn't be left in self-care, but you need to be thoughtful and realistic about your child's level of maturity and how much you (and other responsible adults working with you) are able to supervise from a distance.

You know your child well: Keep your eyes open for any warning signs, such as falling grades or other troubles at school, sleep problems, a lack of interest in sports or other activities that he used to enjoy, and a marked change in personality. These could be a cue that you need to make other arrangements.


RELATED INFORMATION

			The Food Guide Pyramid for Kids
			Latchkey Arrangements

Created February 11, 2001
Reviewed August 26, 2004

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