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| |    The Time & Money Crunch: Managing Holiday Stress by Susan E. Davis reviewed by Laura Jana, M.D., F.A.A.P. OK, you pulled off the Thanksgiving dinner for 25 and even your mother-in-law admitted that "perhaps the turkey wasn't too dry this year." But that satisfaction can fade quickly when you contemplate the next wave of holiday madness that lies just ahead. Suddenly you have to shop, wrap, ship, cook, and decorate, as well as, perhaps, travel, entertain, and attend any number of holiday parties. All that takes lots of money and lots of time, things most of us are feeling in short supply of already. Add to that daunting mix the ingredients of sick kids or sick parents (it's flu season!), work deadlines (it's the end of the year!), and any of the other day-to-day stresses that can afflict families (you're pregnant! the roof is leaking! your credit cards are already maxed out!) and you can feel desperate, irritable, or even depressed. You won't be able to get rid of all the stress at holiday time, but there are ways to make it more manageable. Try these simple steps: Cut back on presents. Presents cost money and shopping takes time. Consider making a family rule of only a few presents per person; it will save your children from overstimulation and your house from still more clutter. With extended families, consider doing even less. You might opt for a lottery system, in which each family member gives a gift to only one other person. Or you might agree with your siblings that each little offshoot of the family tree will take care of its own gift needs (e.g., you don't have to buy presents for Aunt Mary, Uncle Jeff, and their four children). If you just can't let go, maybe you could give one modest gift per family--a new board game, for instance, or a basket filled with fixings for a spaghetti dinner. Other ways to cut back on presents include making them (adults can make holiday wreaths or leaf prints, for instance, while children can paint picture frames, bake cookies, or put their painted handprints on sweatshirts), putting dollar limits on them, or providing certificates for services (e.g., making dinner, washing the dog, or planting a flower garden). Do Less, Not More. It may seem sacrilegious to actually relax and enjoy the holidays, but it can make the whole month a lot more fun. And the best way to relax is to cut back on activities. Skip the annual wrestling of the kids into their holiday garb, taking the family photo, ordering the reprints, and sending them out in cards this year. Parties and other social events can cost you a ton of money (for hostess gifts, clothes, babysitters, etc.) and drive you crazy trying to fit them all in. Consider just attending the ones that you'll really enjoy--a gathering at the home of a cherished friend, perhaps, or your child's winter pageant. Remember Your Own Favorite Things. It's hard to get in touch with the deeper meaning of the holidays when you're pulled in 20 directions at once. This season, in addition to all the wonderful things you do for and with your family, try to work in a little time for yourself. Maybe you crave a religious service where you sit by yourself and don't have to wipe noses, admonish fidgety feet, or dole out paper and crayons. Maybe you'd value a long walk in the woods on New Year's Day to reflect on the year that has passed. Or perhaps knowing that you had a massage or a manicure waiting after a marathon shopping session would put a little spring in your step. Schedule in some time alone to do what makes you feel grounded, joyous, or just plain human again. And don't forget to eat right, get enough sleep, and exercise--those are the basic factors that make you feel lively and quick, just like ol' Saint Nick.
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