 | ||
|
| |    Biting Between Ages Two and Three by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. reviewed and revised by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. If biting is a problem between ages two and three, you have to decide if this is an isolated problem or not. Consider how often the biting occurs and how your child is getting along otherwise. If he is tense or unhappy much of the time and keeps biting other children for no good reason, it's a sign that something is wrong. Perhaps he is being disciplined or restricted too much at home and is frantic and high-strung. Perhaps he has had too little chance to get used to other children and imagines them to be dangerous and threatening. Perhaps he is jealous of a baby at home and carries over the fear and resentment to all other small children, as if they were competitors, too. If biting is but one of many aggressive and worrisome behaviors, then it is only a symptom of a larger problem, and it is that larger problem, rather than the biting, that should draw your attention. Usually, however, biting comes out of the blue like a thunderbolt in an otherwise model citizen. In this case, it is a normal developmental challenge and not a mark of some sort of psychological problem. Still, most parents of biters worry a lot, imagining that their sweet child may grow up to be a cruel adult. But biting is usually a temporary developmental challenge that even the gentlest of children go through. Strategies to diminish the problem First, you need to attempt to prevent the biting before it starts. Are there predictable times it occurs? If so, a little more adult supervision during those times is often useful. Is the child frustrated because he is the least competent member of his play group or because your limit-setting is inconsistent? You may need to consider changing his daily routine. Also be sure to give him lots of positive attention when he is behaving well. (For some children, biting another child is the only time they receive a lot of attention!) If the child's frustration is obviously escalating, try redirecting his attention to another activity. If the child is old enough, you can discuss the problem at another time and ask him to help you think about how it hurts and what else he could do when he has the urge to bite. If the biting has already occurred, you need to give him the firm message that it makes you unhappy and that you do not want him to do it again. Tell him not to do it again. Then sit with him for a few minutes while the message sinks in. Hold his hand or hug him firmly if he tries to go away. Avoid long lectures. Some parents who have been bitten by an infant or a one-year-old ask if they should bite back. Parents should be able to control their child better by staying in charge as a friendly boss than by descending to the child's age level to battle with bites, slaps, or shouts. Besides, when you bite or slap a very young child, he's apt to keep it up, either as a fight or as a game or because he believes that if you are capable of such behavior, why shouldn't he be? The only thing you need to do is to keep from being bitten again by drawing back when he gets that gleam in his eye, showing him clearly that you don't like it and won't let it happen. Look for biting to disappear by age three At that time the child has learned to use words to express his desires or to vent his frustrations. He also has a better ability to restrain his impulses. I'd be concerned if children this age continue to bite. Consult with your doctor, nurse practitioner, counselor, friend, or other parents with similar concerns.
| |  | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| About Us |
Contact Us |
Our Partners Privacy Policy | Ethics | Advertising Policy | Terms of Service © Copyright 2004 The Dr. Spock Company. All Rights Reserved. THIS SITE DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE. The information drSpock.com
provides is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for
professional medical advice. Always seek the advice of your health care
professional if you have a specific health concern. Mention or advertisement
of any product, service, or brand does not constitute endorsement, guarantee,
or recommendation by The Dr. Spock Company. Please read our full
Terms of Service. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
