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| |    The Role of Temperament in Aggression by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. reviewed and revised by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. Your baby's individual temperament has a lot to do with her assertive or aggressive behavior. Temperament describes your child's typical behavioral style: slow, fast, laid-back, intense, sensitive, daredevil, and so on. This article talks about aspects of temperament in regard to the amount of aggressive behavior your young child shows. Intensity of response Think about the usual intensity level of responses that she shows. Intense babies usually don't whimper when sad, they yell; they don't just giggle, they scream with delight. An intense toddler may seem to be more aggressive, when really it is just a matter of style. Persistence Think about how persistent she is. Babies who tend to stick to one activity for a long time can seem aggressive when they are simply following their strong needs to keep on playing or exploring. Positive or negative first response Some children respond negatively to any new experience, either with clinging or crying or even hitting. After a few minutes, when the situation is no longer new, they are fine. If you know to expect this behavior, you can respond more calmly. Activity level Your child's general level of activity also could affect how aggressive she seems. A child who is always on the go has more opportunities to bump into other children or run over their toys. If these children respond in anger, what started out as just a high level of activity can end up looking like aggression. What to do? If you know that your child has one or more temperamental traits that set her up for problems with aggressiveness, you can respond to her behavior more effectively. First, give her the benefit of the doubt. Assume that her behavior was merely rough, intense, daring, or even careless. But avoid labeling it as "bad." Labels like "bad" or "aggressive" tend to make children feel ashamed; if they hear these labels enough, they begin to believe that they are bad kids. If your child has very high energy, make sure there are many opportunities to run it off. Help her to know the difference between places where running is OK and places where she must practice more restraint. If she tends to have a hard time stopping and starting something new, give her one or two warnings, and help her clean up. That little extra attention around a potential stress point can make the difference between a child who feels OK and one who has to act out aggressively.
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