Sex During Pregnancy

September 06, 2008

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Sex During Pregnancy

by Lisa Rodriguez, R.N. and Marjorie Greenfield, M.D.
reviewed by Marjorie Greenfield, M.D.

Whether sex is better than before, is slightly uncomfortable, or is completely absent, virtually every couple discovers that their sexual relationship changes in some way during the course of the pregnancy. While some couples find that sexual desire is enhanced in pregnancy, others find it lacking. There are many reasons why this might occur.

Sex in the first trimester

Concern for the baby
Both the mother and father-to-be can experience many emotions when they find out they are expecting a baby. Some worry that by making love they might injure the baby in some way or cause miscarriage. This fear keeps them from enjoying the activity that got them here in the first place. It can be helpful to understand that the fetus is protected inside your uterus by the amniotic sac. Because sex is perfectly safe in normal, low-risk pregnancies, unfounded medical concerns should not limit your ability to relax and enjoy.

Decreased sexual desire in the first trimester
Many women express decreased sexual desire during the first trimester. This can be related to the many symptoms that often accompany the beginning of pregnancy: fatigue, breast tenderness, nausea and vomiting. When you are feeling poorly, the last thing on your mind is sex. Conversely, some women find that they are experiencing better sex than they have ever had before. This could be related to the changing hormones with pregnancy or because they have never felt so carefree about birth control. For women who have gone through fertility treatment, the relationship between sex and pressure to conceive is over. You certainly don't need to worry about it now!

Sex in the second trimester
In this part of the pregnancy, many women report that they enjoy sex with their partner more than ever. Your abdomen is growing, but is not so large that it is in the way during lovemaking. Many fathers-to-be find that they are more aroused by their partner's changing body. The nausea and vomiting have usually subsided; consequently you are more in the mood to concentrate on your relationship with your partner. Some men feel inhibited, though, and some see the fetus as an "observer" to sex, which can be distressing. Communicating about the feelings can help to resolve them.

Sex in the third trimester
Some women worry about how their changing shape is affecting their partner. They feel less sexually attractive to their mate. It is helpful if their partner is sensitive to this and gives the mother-to-be positive feedback. Numerous couples continue their lovemaking the last three months as they did previously. They find ways around the growing abdomen and don't find it to be an obstacle. Others feel clumsy and awkward as they try to work around their expanding middle.

Positions to try in the last few months of pregnancy

The side-lying position
You and your partner lay facing each other, or he can enter you from behind

The woman-on-top position
You lay on top of your partner, which takes the pressure off of your abdomen. It also is a great position if your baby is low in your pelvis, which can make intercourse uncomfortable for some women. This position gives you more control, to keep penetration from becoming too deep.

The partner-behind position
You can do this standing, kneeling or lying down as described above so that your growing belly will be out of your way.

Cramping
A number of women worry about cramping they might experience during or after intercourse. This is normal in pregnancy. When you get sexually aroused or have orgasms, there is increased blood flow to your pelvis. This can cause cramping in your pelvic area. The cramping should subside soon after intercourse. If cramping continues, and the cramping is at regular intervals, you should call your practitioner

In general, it is safe to continue your sex life until your water breaks or you are in labor. If your pregnancy becomes complicated in any way, discuss any sex-life restrictions with your practitioner.

Communicate!
Whether your sexual relationship remains virtually unchanged with pregnancy, is better than before you were pregnant, or there is a decline in sexual satisfaction, you need to keep the lines of communication open. Honestly talk about your feelings with your partner. This is a time in your life that the two of you should be emotionally linked.


RELATED INFORMATION

			Sex After Giving Birth
			Sports and Exercise During Pregnancy
			Sex and Pregnancy: Mom's Perspective

Created September 19, 2000
Reviewed August 23, 2004

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