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| |     What Spanking Accomplishes by Dr. Benjamin Spock reviewed and revised by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P. For many years now there has been a debate about whether spanking children is a good thing or a bad thing. Most parents report that they use spanking, at least some of the time. Most--but not all--pediatricians and psychologists agree that spanking is not a desirable or particularly effective form of discipline. For example, the American Academy of Pediatrics' official policy says, in part: "Despite its common acceptance, spanking is a less effective strategy than timeout or removal of privileges for reducing undesired behavior in children. Although spanking may immediately reduce or stop an undesired behavior, its effectiveness decreases with subsequent use. The only way to maintain the initial effect of spanking is to systematically increase the intensity with which it is delivered, which can quickly escalate into abuse. Thus, at best, spanking is only effective when used in selective infrequent situations." (American Academy of Pediatrics, April 1998. For full text, go to http://www.aap.org/policy/re9740.html.) Certainly, many perfectly healthy, well-adjusted people were spanked as children. It also seems clear that many children who are never spanked grow up fine as well. The research does not show a huge effect of spanking by itself. The much more important issues are whether discipline is effective and whether the parent-child relationship is a healthy one. That said, we would agree with the Academy of Pediatrics in advising against spanking for several reasons: Reasons to avoid physical punishment Imagine that your six-year-old has taken a toy from a friend's house without asking. This form of stealing is not the sign of a future criminal career, but it is a sign that he has not yet learned an important lesson about property. When you tell your child that what he did was wrong, you would like him to feel a little sorry or a little guilty. These uncomfortable feelings can resurface, when needed, to remind him that stealing is wrong. Suppose instead that you give your child a spanking. Afterward, he is more likely to feel resentful and angry at you. In the future, when tempted, his only thought will be to avoid being caught. If the spanking is hard enough, he might also feel afraid of you. None of these feelings will help him, in the long run, be the kind of person you want him to be. What spanking really teaches Spanking teaches children that the larger, stronger person has the power to get his way, whether or not he is in the right. Some spanked children then feel quite justified in beating up on smaller ones. The American tradition of spanking may be one reason that there is much more violence in our country than in any other comparable nation. Physical force vs. reasoning When an executive in an office or a foreman in a shop is dissatisfied with the work of an employee, he doesn't rush in shouting and whack him on the seat of his pants. He explains in a respectful manner what he would like, and in most cases this is enough. Children are not that different in their wish to be responsible and to please. They react well to praise and high expectations. In the olden days, most children were spanked on the assumption that this was necessary to make them behave. In the 20th century, as parents and professionals have studied children here and in other countries, they have come to realize that children can be well behaved, cooperative, and polite without ever having been punished physically or in any other way. I have known hundreds of such children myself, and there are countries in the world where physical punishment is unknown. Click here to join the discussion on Discipline
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