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Determining Your Parenting Type: A Quiz

by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P.
reviewed by Laura Jana, M.D., F.A.A.P.
Want to know more about your personal parenting style? Take this quiz.

Each question presents a situation that you've probably been in or one you've seen other parents in. For each situation, pick the response that you would be most likely to give on a typical day.

Either print this page and check the circle by your answer or simply jot them down, then go to the scoring charts below and add up your score to get an interpretation of your parenting type.*

  1. You go out to eat with your five-year-old. He wants to walk around the restaurant rather than sit at the table. You...

    • a. let him walk around, as long as he doesn't bother anyone

    • b. insist that he sits still at the table

    • c. let him stand up, as long as he stays next to the table


  2. You're at the store. Your three-year-old starts to cry because you won't buy candy. You...

    • a. tell her she had better stop crying if she ever wants candy again

    • b. tell her gently that you know she really wants it, but you aren't going to buy candy today

    • c. tell her to stop crying and buy her the candy


  3. You're on the phone with a friend. Your six-year-old wants to ask you a question. You...

    • a. frown at her to let her know she's interrupting, then ignore her

    • b. ask your friend to hold and answer the question

    • c. smile, give her a hug, and keep talking to your friend


  4. Your 10-year-old is upset because he struck out in baseball. You...

    • a. tell him to stop crying--there are plenty of kids who have real troubles

    • b. tell him you know how it feels and offer to give him a hug

    • c. tell him that he'll do better next time


  5. Your two-year-old doesn't want to stop playing and you have to leave. She ignores you when you ask nicely for her to come with you. You...

    • a. tell her to stop playing, and if necessary, yell at her

    • b. tell you just have to go; then pick her up and carry her out

    • c. tell her you're going, and she can come with or stay behind


  6. You come home bone tired, and your five-year-old wants to play "horsy." You...

    • a. play horsy for a minute, then offer to read him a story snuggled up on your lap

    • b. tell him to leave you alone, you're tired

    • c. play horsy even though you feel lousy

SCORING

Control
# a b c
1 0 2 1
2 2 2 0
3 2 0 2
4 1 1 0
5 1 2 2
6 1 2 0

Warmth
# a b c
1 1 1 1
2 0 2 1
3 0 1 2
4 0 2 1
5 0 1 0
6 2 0 1


What your scores mean
Add up your points for the "C" (control) chart. If your total is 6 or higher, you fall slightly above the middle point for scores--more on the controlling end. A total of 5 or less puts you in the bottom half.

Do the same for the "W" (warmth) chart. A total of 6 or more is on the high side; 5 or less is on the low side.

Maybe taking this quiz has given you some insight into your parenting style. Don't take it too seriously, though. There is no research to say that scoring low or high on this particular quiz means anything about what kind of a parent you are or how your children are likely to turn out. It's simply a tool to help you think about your parenting in a slightly different way.

*The concept of parenting type used here is loosely adapted from the work of Diana Baumrind, as interpreted by me and explained in "What is Your Parenting Type?"



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Created June 13, 2001
Reviewed June 14, 2001
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